Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Adventures in Smelly Hippie Land

Last night I managed to make deodorant! I started off with angry chicken's recipe, but omitted the cacao butter because the smell is too intense for me (and the vitamine E that I forgot to steal from Amalthea). So why did I have any desire to make my own deodorant?
  • - I absolutelymotherfuckinghate scented deodorants. They nauseate me! For the past five years or so, I've been exclusively using Arm and Hammer Baking Soda's unscented antiperspirant, and it has worked for the most part. Except for
  • - every once in a while, I will feel a sharp pain in my armpit, like a clogged pore or something.
  • - Also, I will still smell after I exercise, no matter how often I reapply.
So what did I use?
  • 1 TBS shea butter
  • 2/5 TBS corn starch
  • 3/5 TBS baking soda
  • - melt in the microwave for 30 seconds, checking every 10 that it doesn't boil over.
  • - mix well and place in fridge to set
  • - a small pea size or less is enough per arm pit (I scrape it with the back of my fingernail and the shard is enough). It will melt very well with body heat.

So I think I put this through the ultimate test. I showered last night and cleaned off the spoon on my pits. I slept in a furnace, and ran many errands in a car that was hotter than deep fried ass. Afterwards, I played two hours of futbol in the damned sun.

At first, my pits felt a bit swampy. The shea butter was too greasy, so I will probably add more dry products next time. But the important thing is that I DON'T SMELL! Like, seriously! After all that, I feel awesome! Ok, now that it's been about three hours since my game, my armpits smell a bit, if I really, really sniff at them. Huzzah!